It is a darn good thing I am fifty, fat and married. I am so bored I could spit. That is what is wrong with me. I am not sad or tired or depressed. I am stagnant. In the past I have addressed this problem in...uh...less than healthy ways.
Nothing like a little seduction to stir things up. Either as the seduced or the seducer. I have had a go at both. That being said we went to see "P.S. I Love You" at the local theatre. I am not even sure how this movie came to be here. Not typical small town fare. I have written before about my infantuation with Gerry Butler. I thought I was cured. Then he stripped...to an old Elvis tune. My cake and eating it. And not a calorie in sight. Whoa Nellie. I'd like to cover this guy in carmel sauce and lick him dry. My husband hates him. Says the only good acting in any of his movies are the death scenes. And there are a lot of them. He is a virtuoso dier. In fact he is dead in this movie.
Anyhoo, the minute he stepped on the screen I knew what my problem was. No not that. Okay maybe some of that, but I am happily married so it was not a problem without a cure. What seeing Gerry again brought home is that I am without passion in my life. I am not involved in anything that seres my senses and beguiles my mind. I need an overwhelming interest outside of myself. In the past, younger, thinner and single, I used promiscuity. No longer an option I choose. So what to do to get the same high? Has to have seduction and power as components. Has to be something my Sunday school class would approve of. Has to be cheap. Has to be semi overwhelming. May have to have something to do with words. Has to take me out of my comfort zone but not scare the crap totally out of me. Has to have a physical component. Has to be fun.
So, if all of you can figure out what to do about cat pee, how about working on this? Is soul shattering passion possible outside of sex? I will be VERY interested to see what you come up with.
Thanks, Bea.
P.S. Found a local friend who wants to join me in using Kay's food plan. She also wants to walk! This is a Godsend for me.
3 comments:
Be careful that it doesn't turn out to be shopping - that seems to be the ONE that many turn to. I was thinking about this very thing yesterday and I suppose it is mild exercise for me. I took 3 classes yesterday - kept my mind relaxed and my body busy. Then I went to a movie too. Someone at the 3rd class said something about TOO MANY classes for me in one day - and I said - you know - if I had said I watched TV for 3 hours, or shopped for 3 hours, or sat and visited with someone for 3 hours - you wouldn't be saying that at all. The classes were very MILD - it was not like running stairs for 3 hours - and it was just what I needed. I do not ruminate (at all, not the whole day) when I exercise.
I get very passionate about Yoga. One has to find a good instructor whose personality you like. Don't be afraid of a master either, because they really know how to teach all levels. In fact are probably better than those just dabbling. The totally cool thing is a true yogi does only what she can with the poses and improving comes with time and practice. There's no competition whatsoever. Just a real good feel good after class. Especially after the yummy corpse pose.
Namaste,
Carol
I was gonna say write some fiction, short stories, but it does not have a physical component. You could hike up a mountain and write. You write so well. Good news on the buddy plan and someone to walk with. I need a food plan now that I am settling back in to a routine. I have been a piggie all day with a seemingly endless appetite. Need to stabilize. Kay knows what she is talking about.
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