Friday, September 18, 2015

Biblical Proportions


Last night while I was sitting on the sofa watching television a wet mouse staggered out from behind Husband's recliner and dropped dead in the middle of the carpet.  Had it drowned?

This summer the valley has been invaded by rodents.  I am talking a plague like invasion.  I half keep expecting frogs next.  No on in recent memory has seen so many nasty furry little creatures.  We have never had voles, chipmunks or squirrels.  One or two mice in the fall maybe but that is all.  Not this year.  Good grief.  Rumor has it that a woman down the road has killed 125 voles in her yard.  One hundred and twenty five.  The mind boggles.  We live about a mile from the forest edge.  The chipmunks and squirrels stay in the woods.  Not this year.  I am currently watching a squirrel raid my bird feeder.  Nobody in our little non-incorporated hamlet has ever seen a squirrel in "town".  The chipmunks have about driven me nuts.  They have eaten all my raspberries and strawberries.  Husband finally built a cage around the strawberries.  The uppity little things then sat on top the cage and chattered at me.  The voles invaded my flower garden and ate all my tulip and lily bulbs.  They also ate the roots of my old fashioned yellow rose by the front door and have I think killed it.  They are currently chowing down on the roots of the ancient lilac bushes.  I think they have met their match there.  We have railroad ties all around the front yard. They have tunneled under them.  It is like a vole subdivision. The neighbor has it worse than me.  Her son was talking a shower when she heard blood curdling screams.  Whole family raced to the bathroom to rescue the kid.  He was standing naked, dripping and pointing to the floor of the still running shower.  He was terrified.  He is twenty-two.  There in the shower bottom was a rat looking up at them and holding on to the inside of the drain grid for dear life. It had apparently come up through the plumbing.  That is impossible, they have a septic tank.  I hate them with a deadly hate that should shrivel them.

Back to the drowned mouse.  In addition to the biblical rodent invasion we are having biblical downpours.  We have an old house.  The foundation is cement and rubble.  Over time the cement has deteriorated leaving gaps in the rubble.  I think the mice are getting in through that.  I can't stand traps so I have poison bait all over the basement.  I think the mouse boated in, found the bait, ate it and came upstairs seeking medical aid.  Phooey.

And so it goes.


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