This is what happens when you read words you have no idea how to pronounce.
Neighbor just gave up with the snow blower. From my erie I can see the whole town. He went inside no doubt to weigh the dog and contemplate how much eating he could get out of it when WE ARE ALL MAROONED IN OUR HOUSES FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE WINTER. Still snowing. I am grateful we have electricity and no tornadoes.
I have had two epiphanies since Wednesday. Have already forgotten one. Don't you just love menopause? The other one has stayed with me. Are you ready? Here goes........eat less. And for that you had your suit spotted and shoes shined.
I was praying about my fat. I do that a lot. I was also plotting a renewed campaign of magic food combinations. Now God, I said, please help me to eat more protein and less carbs. And direct my intake of fiber. Guide me to recipes containing some remnant of taste. Help me to not eat salt and caffeine. Please provide the gumption and finances to purchase and eat only whole living foods. Lead me into knowledge about vitamins and minerals and spices. Will chromium and cinnamon really reduce my blood sugar? Let me only eat three balanced meals a day and a protein rich bedtime snack. Make me hate chocolate. In your name, Amen.
Quick as a wink I was enveloped in love, humor and peace. A peace I am having a hard time describing. But I'll try. Have you ever been in pain, bad pain, and been given a high powered pain killer? When it first begins to work and brings that feeling of ease and freedom as you stretch tight limbs and take deep breaths. You roll your shoulders and wiggle your toes. You sort of sit up and begin to take notice of life. The sweet lassitude of all being right with the world pervades your soul. That is the sort of peace I felt. Like coming home after a horrible taxing journey. I could relax. Then this voice filled with wry loving laughter said, "Honey, why don't you just eat less." I knew I had heard the voice of God. And it all made perfect sense. I could see my way clear. For about a minute.
Then the clouds closed. What about the cravings? What about motivation? What about hunger? What about the solace of solitary snacking? What about volume? What about sugar driven binges? What about the magic combinations of carbs and proteins guaranteed to keep my fat storing blood sugar in check? What about addiction and compulsion? Dear God what about fiber?
Less of what? Less protein, carbs, sugar, green leafy veg, soy protein powder, salsa?
I am still reeling from the implications of these two words. Eat less. Of everything. No plotting or planning or plaguing my food. No weighing or measuring or time to brood? (I need to nip this Dr. Seuss phraseology in the bud.) I know about nutrition. I know about diet strategy. They are second nature. I don't need to figure out what I need to eat, or when I need to eat. I already know that. I just need to...eat less.
Take care. Your epifannied one, Bea.