I may have gone off the deep end with this self care thing. Or not. I don't know. How do "normal" women groom themselves? I have been fat and body unconscious for so long I have lost track. Heck, who are we kidding I never knew. I was raised by durable fat religious farm women. Clean and modest were their highest goals. Fashionable and feminine they were not. I wore either long dresses for church or jeans and men's flannel shirts for school. Throughout my teen years I looked like Euell Gibbons on weekdays and Granny Moses on weekends. Then I went to nursing school. Let me just say, white does not flatter anyone but angels. Twenty some years of various shades of white. It is enough to make a body weep. Then I was drafted. No I did not actually join the military, I just looked like it. Olive drab, navy blue, gun metal gray, why did I think these colors made me look thin and cheerful? Any way I have never really applied the concepts of fashion or femininity to my self. Now seems to be the time.
Clothing, cosmetics and body work come later. I will address hair in this post. Let me begin by saying I am no longer gainfully employed. We have also just moved. Money is not just outside sticking out of the snowbanks for harvesting. Keep this vital piece of information in mind. I do.
I guess this mania all started with my first hair cut after we moved up here. I was badly in need of shearing and coloring. Short and practical with a few blond highlights had been my style since my late twenties. I am now 50. Twenty five years of the same hair style. I never noticed.
I made an appointment at a salon for my usual do. I was not real nervous because anyone can cut my hair cap and slap a few light streaks on the top. I should have worried. I knew I was in trouble when the "stylist" turned out to be twenty and cute as a bug's ear. She was also self confident and aggressive. She took one look at my long (for me) drab hair and said you need color and shape. Did I? What precisely did she mean by color? More warmth it turned out. These ashy blobs are doing nothing for you she said, fingering my blobs like they were contagious. Your base color is also the wrong tint for your skin. What color is it she asked? My own I squeaked. "Ahh" was all she said. This child then took me in hand.
After quite a while I had red/blond hair with gold highlights. I looked in the mirror and recognized the person looking back at me. She was 28. To say I was pleased was the understatement of the year. I attempted to thank my baby benefactress. I told you, she said, you just needed some color. She then got out her razor. No, wait, I said, I want a little cap of hair and I know you can't give me a little cap of hair with that. She ignored me. You need length and some height on top. She began to saw at my dry hair. I almost fainted. Relax she said it will be fine. And it was. A modern haircut. I no longer looked like I should have a little white hat perched atop my head. I looked relaxed and sporty. Sexy she said, but I am not willing to go that far.
Did I mention I am not good with my hair. I had a hair cap for twenty years because I did not want to mess with it. This new "do", I was to find out, required more care than a newborn. I will begin with product. Not products, product. Product turns out to be glue. It is called mousse, root lifter, volumizing foam and spray adhesive. I needed a recipe card to tell me how and in what order to apply all this gunk to my hair. Turns out I also needed an iron. Check, I had an iron. Not that kind of iron. A flat curling iron. (Oxymoronic) Then I needed a blow dryer. Check, had a blow dryer. I quit using it when the shag went out of style. Old blow dryer would not work. Did not have a "directed end." Well...yes. Directed end = a nozzle deal with a slit it it. I also needed a round brush. Check, had a round brush, see shag comment. Not a plastic one silly, had to have a metal base with silicone bristles. I was certainly behind the times. What ever happened to Dippity Do and orange juice cans?
I left the shop a younger and wiser women. A wiser woman with a shopping bag full of product, tools, and an instruction booklet for my new hair style. Anyone care to guess how much all of this cost? I am not telling. I am too embarrassed.
There has been some fallout from this first enlightening visit. (Not my hair.) Mark promptly used up the $13 can of hair spray gluing a bunch of cardboard together. "It said spray adhesive and was in a silver can. Why didn't the darn thing say hairspray," he wondered? Why indeed? Root lifter makes my hair look spiky. I do not want to look like Sting. Mousse weighs my hair down and makes it oily. VO5 is cheaper if I desire oily flat hair. My old hair dryer did not work. I did need the directed end. The new brush gets caught in hair less often than the old one. Luminescent spray if fabulous. Makes my hair shine. Worth the $20. Have received tons of compliments on new haircut. Have begun wearing earrings again. Also makeup. Gorgeous hair seems to need it. Is fun fixing my hair. This is the real change.
But, have I gone too far? Much more on this later. Take care of yourselves. Love Bea.